Eterneva Provides Comfort After Loss: Queen Sadie’s Story

Eterneva is an Austin, TX based startup specializing in the creation of memorial diamonds from cremation ashes or hair. Co-Founder Adelle Archer was inspired to create the company after the loss of a close friend. Archer discovered lab grown diamonds as a more meaningful way to honor her friend's memory. Utilizing the latest technology, Eterneva is able to create authentic lab grown diamonds from the carbon present in cremated remains or hair.

As the company has evolved, Eterneva now offers an entire memorial experience, starting with a Welcome Kit that provides everything a customer needs to plan the perfect diamond. This includes selecting size, color, and even jewelry setting, as well as providing personal details so that their memorial package can be carefully constructed with their loved one in mind.

But what also makes Eterneva unique is that the service isn't exclusive to humans. In fact, many of the diamonds that Eterneva produces are to memorialize pets. Recently Eterneva sat down with Janelle Scheifele, to talk with her about the loss of her dog Sadie, and how her diamond has helped her heal through her grief journey.

Please tell us about Sadie!

We called her Queen Sadie because she combined a sassy attitude and kind heart. Sadie was a Boston Terrier who could be demanding and liked her routines. I got her when I was 15 years old, and my parents gave me complete responsibility for her. They would drop us off together at dog training classes. I think the fact Sadie let a 15-year-old train her shows her genuine kindness.

My parents allowed me to pick a dog as a Christmas gift when I was 15. My mom talked my dad out of choosing the dog for me because she knew I could be anxious and serious and would want to select my pet.

When I went to pick out Queen Sadie, she was in a litter of three puppies that were only four weeks old. She was born on January 13^, 2003, and we celebrated her birthday every year after that. I knew Sadie was the dog for me when she gently laid her head on my brother's shoulders as we considered all the puppies in the litter. We visited again two weeks later, and Sadie did the same thing with me. I got to take her home when she was eight weeks old.

Sadie lived past age 16, so I had her for half my life and through the most formative years. We were kindred spirits, and I called her my freelance therapist. I had anorexia as a teenager and have always struggled with depression and anxiety. She was there through all of it.

One of the funniest memories I have of Sadie is that she hated to be outside alone. If one of us put her out in the backyard, she would just bark at the door until someone joined her. She liked to sit on the swing with me when I read a book.

Sadie had a hard time walking long distances as she got older, so I did something I never thought I would do. I bought a stroller and pushed her outside. Being outside was good for my mental health, and I wanted Queen Sadie to be with me. I lived in downtown Toronto at the time and did not have a car.

Sadie and I walked everywhere, and I especially enjoyed walking late at night. People sitting out on patio restaurants would pay a lot of attention to the dog in the stroller. I think Sadie loved that.

As for my favorite memory of Sadie, I would have to say it was the last vacation I took in 2017. She passed away in 2019. My brother and I went to Paris and Cologne, and we were gone for 10 days. I developed severe digestion problems on the trip. Sadie knew I did not feel well when I got home. Before that trip, I lived in Ghana for 10 months. I think Sadie felt we should not be apart again. We did not spend another night apart for the remainder of her life.

What I miss the most about Sadie is just our day-to-day interactions and having her be such an important part of my life. She developed Cushing's disease when she got older, which meant I needed to schedule my life around her needs. Even though she was sick, I know that Sadie loved the one-on-one attention and having me around so much.

My parents kept Sadie for the 10 months I was in Ghana completing my master's degree in non-profit organization. Although I felt bad about leaving her, I knew the timing was right for my career. I got to Skype with my parents and Sadie often, so that made the separation a bit more bearable. I knew I did not want to wait until she reached old age to go to Ghana because she would need so much more attention. Sadie never forgot who I was, no matter how long I was away.

Why did you choose to turn Queen Sadie into a diamond?

When the time came, I knew I would want to memorialize Sadie any way I could. I started by getting a tattoo of her paw print when she was still alive. I think that was to help prepare myself for when she passed. Age 16 is old for a dog, and I am grateful to have had her in my life for as long as I did. Losing her was still not easy, though.

Sadie stopped responding to her medication for Cushing's disease. Her veterinarian thought she might have a tumor and discovered one in her abdomen with an ultrasound. At her age and with the suffering she was experiencing, I chose not to prolong her life. I knew that keeping her alive would only be for my benefit because her quality of life had changed so dramatically.

I have special memories of our last day together. I had already arranged for in-home euthanasia, which I highly support and recommend. We got up early that day and went for a walk. Sadie rode in her stroller, of course.

We sat on the couch together when we got back from our walk, and I let her have her favorite treat of peanut butter, bacon, and marshmallows. After the veterinarian gave her an injection, she passed away peacefully while sitting between us. I was so happy that I allowed her that dignity.

Sadie died in late August, and it only took me until October to find the ideal way to remember her. I felt so lost without her and started searching for how I could memorialize her right away. Some of the options I found were collecting her ashes and putting them into a necklace or keeping her ashes in a vase. I kept looking for better options because I did not care to go through with either one of those possibilities. That is when I found Eterneva.

Jewelry is not really my thing, but I was excited to learn I could turn Sadie's ashes into a diamond. I decided on the spot that is what I would do. I understand that most customers take a lot longer to go ahead with the process, but I knew right away that I would do it. I had searched for quite a while and did not find a service better than what Eterneva offered.

What appeals to you about making a diamond out of Queen Sadie's ashes?

I liked that I could wear a diamond necklace and always have Sadie close to my heart. Since everyone referred to her as Queen Sadie, it only seemed right that she became a beautiful, shiny diamond after her death. I thought about requesting to have a ring made but had to consider that I might develop a rash due to sensitive skin.

Around the one-year anniversary of Sadie's death, I had a session with an animal communicator that helped me feel even more secure about my decision. I asked the person working with me if she would tell Sadie that I was having her made into a diamond. She told me immediately that Sadie loved that idea.

Then the animal communicator told me that I would have a necklace at some point in the future and that Sadie would somehow be a part of it. She had no idea I was planning to turn Sadie's ashes into a necklace.

Sadie usually slept in my bed, and it felt strange not to have her there anymore. I had a hard time getting to sleep for quite a while after she passed away. I plan to wear my necklace 24 hours a day once Eterneva finishes processing it. That way I will always have Sadie with me, even when I am sleeping.

How do you ultimately want to remember Sadie?

One thing I want to remember for sure is her sassy little personality. People without pets in their lives sometimes assume that all breeds of animals are the same, but I know that is not true. Sadie had a unique personality and could communicate quite well with me. I feel comforted by the fact that we had a deep connection. Sometimes I knew what Sadie needed before she could show or tell me in her own special way.

Most of all, I want to remember the connection that Sadie and I shared. Sure, she was cute and loved the attention she got from her outfits and riding in a stroller. The thing I miss and want to remember the most is how much we loved each other.

How has the passing of your beloved dog affected your views on life and death?

I went back to therapy after Sadie died. I had gone through therapy when I was much younger and consider myself a well-adjusted person today. I knew I needed a bit of extra help because one of the primary relationships in my life no longer existed. Many people do not realize that the grief involved in losing a pet can be just as strong as losing a human family member.

In therapy, I saw how my life was different now because it no longer centered around Sadie's needs. I got up every four hours during the night to take care of her. Although I would do it again if she were still living, I realized that part of loving someone is letting them go when their time comes.

Sadie taught me so much about unconditional love. A pet's love is so pure. It never mattered what I looked like or what kind of day I had. She was always happy to be with me and take whatever attention I could give her. If I only had 20 minutes to go for a walk and was busy the rest of the day, Sadie never complained.

My dog also showed me that I had more love to give than I thought I did. I have no desire to get married or have children, but I have a lot of love and joy inside of me to give to whoever I meet. I could not experience these feelings for many years, but Sadie stayed by my side anyway. I believe she helped to improve my mental health more than any therapist ever could.

What message do you want to leave with people who read your story?

I would encourage anyone who is thinking of memorializing their pet this way to trust their instincts and just do it. It is hard for me to put into words just how meaningful it will be to have a part of Sadie with me everywhere I go. The process takes several months, but I understand creating something this special takes time. It really gives me something to look forward to knowing I will receive a notice from Eterneva soon that my diamond necklace is ready.

I feel like having the diamond made from Sadie's ashes was an excellent metaphor for the entire grieving process. Even as I was grieving my loss, I always felt better when I received updates about where Eterneva was in the process of preparing my diamond. Knowing that I was that much closer to holding the finished product in my hand gave me an emotional boost that is hard to describe.

Another thing I want to say is that getting a new pet can help the grieving process come full circle, but no one should take that step before they are ready. Nearly two years have passed since Sadie's death. I am taking in a six-year-old dog soon because I am not at a place in my life where I can devote the time and energy that a puppy needs.

I feel that having nearly two years passed and the fact I have such a special physical reminder of Sadie will help me be the best pet parent for my new dog. I know they are different animals and comparing one to the other is not fair.

Even though no pet can ever play the same role in my life that Sadie did, I still have love to give. After all, I am not in the same place in life I was all the years Sadie was living. The human heart is big enough to love many people and animals at once and give it back to them in ways that meet their unique needs. Working with Eterneva has helped me to realize this.